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In A Nutshell

Jan 8, 2011 2:28:54 PM - thesundayleader.lk

Cool Advice
The mini hustings are to be held at the same time as the World Cup. Our erstwhile Captain Cool has warned that any violence at the hustings will show the world how we natives operate. This was sweet, sweet music to El Presidente’s ears, as his team is on a downward trend. Now, he can stagger the hustings, particularly in the spots where the arenas are. That includes Ham Ban Tot. How convenient for Presidente!

No can Do

Former Pee-Emm Rat Na Siri was sent to Siberia. Oops… we mean Bra Zil after his recent rantings. Other seniors were asked to target him in turn. But no can do master sir was the reply. So there!

More Money, More Problems

The recent long jumper Johnny Come Lately was to call the Chief of the bank that belongs to the People to admonish the blighter. Apparently some of Johnny’s blue eyed boys were standing in a queue at the bank with letters of recommendation for loans. The big boss of the bank was not impressed. “You’re just a recent long jumper” he said. Poor Johnny went back to El Presidente to complain. Sulk, sulk!

On your marks…!
This Paradisian isle is going to add on two mini isles. One would be a creation after the capital’s South port, the other in Ham Ban Tot. Guess what? An eight lane F1 track will be ringing around the Colombo port isle. Any guesses which souped-up vehicle would be the first to do the merry go around on the new isle? Our money’s on the beloved Merv the Perv in his brand new Jag! Vroom vroom!!

Short Crop
So Sajeeth, the green leader in waiting has his hair trimmed at you  guessed it…. none other than his better half’s spa, the jaaal.  And in a bid to impress us wild asses at this ole rag he invited us to join him at the jaaal as he had all those split ends snipped. And then for good measure he insisted on paying the bill. One thousand smackers. After which, for good measure, he tipped the lad who chopped his mane an additional 550. Dear! Dear! What won’t this manthrithumas do to impress us journos eh?
Double Entendres

Recently, El Presidente made a proclamation as to how the top boys for the World Cup should be selected. “The best must play and no one should be left out,” he said wisely. But all the Selection Boys didn’t know what to make of it. Whether to keep Sana Boy or not, but ultimately chose the latter. Hmmm