By The Incurable Romantic
My friend, who is a happily married ‘incurable romantic’ told me a few days ago: “It is odd how the universe works, incompetent dumbos get jobs and witchy airheads get husbands.”
I don’t think she meant this as a general statement but one has to admit that of late, many of the interesting, knowledgeable, educated and cool human beings I know are walking around this country unemployed and single with their degrees turning grey and musty! Let’s first take the job issue.
The average human being works towards a goal. I like to know that my job is having some kind of result with, even better, a positive impact on people or some cause. But with a lot of employees turning into bizarre psychopathic human beings who would make Norman Bates look like a puppy dog, it is getting harder every second to satisfy one’s professional aspirations. My personal experiences have been both unpleasant and extremely revealing but every time my skin grows thicker and my ability to bounce back gets faster.
I have had employers look at my face and even before I have sat down, they had told me that I would not fit the profile. That happened in a well reputed ad agency. The man spoke to me, squeezing his toes while his shoes and socks lay around his office floor. Needless to say, I did not shake his hand when I stepped out of his office!
In my latest employment mishap, the head of the organisation who had agreed to give me a three month contract (probation period) suddenly retracted her offer on the day that I was supposed to have collected the letter. Reasons given: I don’t trust her, why do I want to bind her with a contract?, this is one big family blah blah and for a brief moment, I was speechless and hurt to be thought of as a silly, naïve, inexperienced human being who does not know that nobody works without some proof of employment! The last time I did that was when I was 18 years old and doing some baby-sitting!
And I can go on with the anecdotes. My words of wisdom to whoever is embarking on their careers; please think twice before starting a job anywhere. Your employers will take, but don’t expect to get anything back. Ironically it is my worst paying job which provides me with the most amount of satisfaction. So if you are given the opportunity or if you are lucky enough to have enough backing either from your spouse or your family to do something you love even if it does not pay well, do it. Life is short, as long as the passion is there, the rest does not matter.
As for the marriage issue. I really draw a blank on that point. I don’t think all those who are married are “witchy airheads”, because that would make the person who made this statement one of them. Maybe it is karma or bad timing but I know of a bunch of wonderful women, me inclusive of course who are single and probably doomed to never become mothers. Our romantic streak cannot accept the concept of an arranged match and our desire to nurture sometimes becomes unbearable. A good friend of mine tells me how occasionally, she falls into deep depression at the idea of living her life alone and taking care of her aging family whom she deeply loves.
No job and not even a mountain of cash will ever replace the love of a human being, even though employment and money do provide temporary satisfaction. If you want your life to be bearable, my guess would be to not think about what you do not have, simply because it will not make the missing links appear. Always focus on your own happiness and the rest will follow.
Life’s unfair, no doubt; but then again there are those lovely, simple moments like the one I had yesterday with one of my oldest friends in her house full of dogs, babies and warmth. We fell on her bed and just talked while sipping home made coffee. The dog licked my toes and her adorable little nephew butted into the conversation. That afternoon was perfect and I wish there were more of them.
And there will be. As a fellow incurable romantic, hope will never leave me!